Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize