You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Randomize