her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
