we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
