You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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