someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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