Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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