My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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