Define "chronic" masturbator.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
