do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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