can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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