Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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