On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...