It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
