This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Bring me that man meat
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
