he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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