I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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