I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
