She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize