I didn't shave. On purpose
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
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