All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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