I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
