BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
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