I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize
