I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize