Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
