so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
