after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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