I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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