Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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