how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
