I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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