i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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