I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
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