Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
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Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
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The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
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