I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
