But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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