i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Randomize
