I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
They took my balls.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
tell me about the eggs
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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