If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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