so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
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They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
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my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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