So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize