I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I just sucked dick on a ferry
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