She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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