S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
