Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Randomize