They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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