So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
and i looked up. we had an audience...
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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