Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
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