im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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