But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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