He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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